50 Proven Self-Care Solutions for Partners of Trauma Survivors

50 Proven Self-Care Solutions for Partners of Trauma Survivors (by Partners) Heather Tuba @heathertuba partner trauma survivors

“What do you do for self-care?”

It’s one of the first questions asked by partners when they join the Facebook support group Partners to Survivors with Complex Trauma. New members want to know what partners do while regular members share helpful and new self-care activities. After many discussions on the topic, I asked members if I could compile a list and share it. I hope other partners can benefit from these ideas. I also expect this list will continue to grow, but here it is so far!

50 Proven Self-Care Solutions for Partners of Trauma Survivors by Partners

1. Time with your kids
2. Beekeeping
3. Reading
4. Going to the gym
5. Take a long soak in a hot bubble bath

“Self-care is showing your kids who you are as a person. Include them on things you like camping, bike riding, cooking, etc. Including them in on things you enjoy is part of self-care. I will take my kids out for hikes all the time.” ~ Partners group member

6.  Separate activities and interests from my partner
7.  Sometimes, it’s basic daily activities like taking a shower and getting dressed
8.  Go to bed early and fall asleep reading
9.  Going to see my doctor
10. Getting a manicure every three weeks
11. Mindfulness-based stress reduction
12. Volunteer work
13. Playing Ms. Pacman
14. Play video games
15. Cooking

50 Proven Self-Care Solutions for the Partners of Trauma Survivors Heather Tuba @heathertuba Partners Trauma Survivors

16. Listening to music
17. Singing
18. Playing an instrument
19. Find new music to add to my digital library
20. Taking walks
21. Photography
22. Journal
23. Knitting
24. Gardening
25. Reading entertainment magazines

26. “Sometimes I just get a cup of coffee by myself.” ~ Partners group member

50 Proven Self-Care Solutions for Partners of Trauma Survivors Heather Tuba @heathertuba Partners Trauma Survivors

27. Self-care can be as simple as flossing or brushing your teeth every morning
28. Meditation
29. Call up a friend (or two)
30. Visit a friend
31. Training my service dog
32. Go for a sunset walk with my dog
33. Put the phone on silent and just ENJOY the SOLITUDE (No overthinking, no ruminating. Brain OFF!)
34. Working out
35. Running outdoors
36. Cycling
37. Yoga
38. Martial arts
39. Massaging my face and neck, hands, arms with essential oils
40. Getting a massage

50 Proven Self-Care Solutions for the Partners of Trauma Survivors Heather Tuba @heathertuba Partners Trauma Survivors

41. Get out into my workshop and get creative
42. Renovation projects
43. Work in my metal shop
44. Refinishing furniture
45. Ride my motorcycle
46. Going for a drive
47. Go on a road trip with my kids
48. Bake cookies
49. Order take out
50. Stop whatever I am doing to take 5 slow breaths

“Most of these I do as everyday activities when I can, but when I’m in need of self-care, they take on a new importance, and I treat them like rituals. The big difference is that when in self-care mode, I KNOW that I’m doing these things to restore my emotional/spiritual energy. As everyday activities, they are simply a maintenance function. Either way, it helps to restore and protect myself when I am in a low spot.” Partners group member

Photo credits:  Aaron Burden on Unsplash; Jason Briscoe on Unsplash; M. Henderson on Unsplash; m0851 on Unsplash.

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