Is your heart hurting right now? Are you lonely, sad, or scared? Maybe you are worn out from the pandemic, the state of society, or the uncertainty of the world. Maybe you've done self-care and it's still not enough. Maybe, just maybe, you would really love for it all to just go away.
What if you entered this time period in an already fragile state? You are someone in a close relationship with a trauma survivor: a partner, a friend, a co-parent, an adult child, or a family member. You are doing your best to be there, to try to understand, but you are struggling too. You feel sad about what's happened to your loved one and about how it affects your relationship. Perhaps you feel lonely when a trigger seems to take them far away.
Your heart is aching.
Heartache: emotional pain or distress; sorrow; grief; anguish.
Maybe you have talked about your feelings with a friend, a therapist, or a coach like me. But you are worried because sometimes the emotional pain feels overwhelming and you are wondering if there is relief.
Is there anything else you can do?
I believe there is. It doesn't involve talking or journaling or anything to do with language and it won't take much time. While these simple suggestions - really, gestures - won't completely fix your struggles, they may help soothe and comfort you. A bonus is you might discover they help you think clearer and connect a little stronger with yourself and those you care about.
It might soothe your aching heart.
For most people, this exercise is calming because it activates the parasympathetic nervous system. If you feel overwhelmed at any point, please stop.
- Place your hands over your heart.
- Pressure can be light or heavy. You decide what feels right for you.
- Eyes can be open or shut.
- Notice the gentle rise and fall of your hands as your breath moves in and out.
- Stay with this motion for as long as you wish.
Try this if you need a little more:
- Place your right hand over your heart.
- Gently place your left hand on your belly.
- Lower your head and focus on the hand on your belly.
- Notice the rise and fall of your abdomen.
- Stay with this as long as you wish.
If you want to know what this exercise is about...
Resources are those things, actions, and qualities we can draw upon for aid in times of need. Somatic resources are a category of resources that are body based. They emerge from a person’s physical experience.Somatic Resource Training